5 Years Post Op | Artificial Disc Replacement Surgery | Part 13 of 13

What a privilege it is to be writing this post right now. Looking back 5 years ago, I had no idea what the future held in terms of chronic pain and my back issues. Today – I couldn’t have dreamed of or prayed for a better outcome.

As much success as I’ve seen in the last 5 years, I’ve also struggled, as I’ve documented here. I knew going in to my surgery that a positive outcome wasn’t a guarantee. Post-surgery, I had unbearable nerve pain in both of my feet. It also felt like I was in body prison while I had to limit movement for 3 months to allow my spine to properly heal and allow the disc to properly attach. I experienced very slow progress as I tried to get back to my regular running routine, and at separate times both the labrums in my hips (right and left) tore causing excruciating pain. The physiology of my body was reconstructing, and as incredible as that was it still took time for my body to adapt to the newness. I experienced mental depression and worked tirelessly with my trusted therapist to push past the difficult thoughts. I worked to improve my mindset by consciously celebrating every small step forward even if it there were 3 bigger steps backward. Progress is progress. All this to say, after 5 years my back feels better than it ever has post-surgery. It’s important for me to be honest here, so I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t really feel or mean it to be true.

The last 7 or so months I’ve noticed a huge increase in sturdiness and strength of my back. I didn’t think it was possible to feel as great as I feel now, I even ventured back into my first love and passion – gymnastics. After a long time away, it feels incredible to be back in the gym. I’m able to flip, leap, balance, back bend, and more… miraculously without pain. After a recent practice, I got in my car and sobbed tears of happiness, but mostly unbelief. From the inability to walk around the mall after work, to  expressing myself through my favorite sport every week, is more than I could have even dreamed of or prayed for.

Earlier this week, I saw a post from my Texas surgeons (Center for Disc Replacement) on Instagram. Wanting to share my gratitude, I wrote a comment detailing a bit about my positive experience after 5 years. A few days later someone else commented, but wasn’t experiencing the outcome I was. I commented back and asked to hear a bit more if they were willing to share. The response was hard to hear. His surgery was 9 months ago; he is currently disabled and in terrible/constant pain. We had the same exact surgery, but vastly different outcomes. This isn’t the only outcome I’d heard of like this, as I’ve heard from a few other people that were still struggling with their artificial discs and ultimately had to have it removed and then a complete fusion and reconstruction of the spine.

Feeling fortunate for my outcome, I also felt a sense of reality that my outcome could have been just like this person I was talking to and grieving with. I didn’t feel guilt, I felt reality. I also felt the need to be even more grateful and not take my outcome for granted. I let this person know I would be thinking and praying for him and his family and wished him well. I went away with a somber thought, no matter how grateful I am… I can always be more grateful.

These adorable people (and more not pictured) were there for me when I was hurting the most.

And when I felt like no one understood my pain and struggles, I looked to Him.
He gives me strength.

Learning to be grateful in a way I never imagined, is also an unexpected gift. It is also the pathway to greater happiness, joy, and peace… daily. When we assign purpose to our pain, we can learn lessons in the great classroom of life. Thank you as always for reading and following along, wishing you the best week!

PS – If you haven’t heard, I’m sharing life lessons (like this one) in monthly podcasts of Season 2 of The Ashleigh Deane Show and I’d love for you to tune in!